You all knew this day was coming. You really did. Think about it. I always said it: "I'm not ready to let go of Interlochen...yet. I'm not ready to move on...yet." But here I am, nineteen and in college, writing a blog in which I reference Interlochen Arts Academy fifteen times a post. It's considered a success if I go for one post without mentioning my high school. And you know what? It just hit me today, while I was feeling what I thought to be righteous indignation over a certain friend's insistence that I talk about nothing but Interlochen, that...well...he is kind of right. (But don't let him know I said that, or I'll never hear the end of it.)
You see, everyone, I have this friend. Her name is Mishka. She calls me the Delightful Barnacle. I call her Pretty Damn Amazing, because she is. And one of the things I love about Mishka is that her personality is so distinctive that once you meet her, you know her. Permanently. You do not forget this woman. Trust me. And she has these things, these pop-culture-y things, that you always think of when you think of her--you think of The Brothers Karamazov, you think of Snatch, you think of Sylvia Plath and Lady Lazarus, you think of long dresses and Victorian lace-up boots and cloche hats and elegant cigarette holders. Things of that nature.
Now, if this friend is to be believed, I have my defining bits too...and one giant part of that is made up of Interlochen.
There are things I will never give up, of course. My "thing" will probably always be beatniks, for instance, and I'm okay with that. But I really do need to let go of Interlochen. Because hey, guess what? I am out of high school. Yes, I am. And I've been saying for months and months and months now that I KNOW I'm out of high school and I'm OVER high school and guess what? I wasn't. Not really.
I am now. I am ready to move on.
So, I think you all know where this is going...
It's time to say goodbye to Alien Water Torture.
BUT! It does NOT mean I'm not blogging anymore! Really, I am! Just not here. Because as much as I love this blog, it's another thing that is tying me to high school, and I need to let go of that. I need to stop mourning films like Possession and He's A Rockstar and their lack of success, because guess what? I am going to make more films. I AM making more films. I'm going to make HUNDREDS of films! I am going to make so many films I won't even freaking remember all of them! And I'm going to have a kick-ass time doing it!
But I am not going to keep clinging to Alien Water Torture. That is a film that will never be made, and you know what? I'm not sorry, because that just means that my two lovely imaginary friends (because really, that's all characters are, when you think about it) Gavin and Ronnie will remain pure, just the way I want them. I'll never have to share them or let studio executives make them over. They will always be mine, and I will always love them, and I will never resent what they've become. And this goes for Possession as well--I can accept that film now as part of my AWT universe. I don't mind the way it turned out. It's not going to the Academy any time soon...but it's mine, and I can be proud of it, and I don't resent it anymore.
So it's time for me to leave high school behind. Not all of it, of course--I'll still talk to the friends who haven't graduated yet, and I'll keep wearing my Interlochen sweatervest (much to the confusion of my college friends) and I'll occasionally look up my old pictures and sigh reminiscently. But I'm going to stop longing for the past, and I'm going to stop regretting both things I did and didn't do, and I am going to let go of those old grudges and crushes and silly little dreams that I know now are not meant to come true.
It's time to say good-bye to Alien Water Torture, and say hello to College Avery. She's a nice girl. I think you'll like her...once she figures out how to write a blog without referencing Interlochen 5,000 times in one post. She is still Beatnik Belle, but she has earned other nicknames too. She has been kissed. She has gone to Italy. She has seen eight thousand long-dead bodies prominently displayed on a cave wall and managed to get out of that cave without having a panic attack. She has had her films played on TV. She has gotten thousands of hits on her blogs and movies. She has joined a sorority and been in The Vagina Monologues and gone out after midnight and danced in a thunderstorm at two in the morning. She has met survivors of sexual assault, survivors of school shootings, survivors of hurricanes, people with autism, people with disabilities, gay strippers, Italian artists, British flight attendants, and all kinds of other people who she never thought she would meet. She's still not 100% sure she knows exactly who she is, but she's figuring it out.
I should have done this months ago. But it's okay, because I'm doing it now.
Good-bye, Alien Water Torture.
I'll let you know when my random, wild thoughts have a new home. (Translation: Yes, I will post the URL.)
One last time, for posterity...
STOLEN DIALOGUE
"I'm the best at trees...but I'm the best at slides, too!"
"The magic bathtub? I'm glad you asked!"
Person one: Think about it--who controls the churches?
Person two: Oh my gosh...for a minute there, I thought you asked, 'Who controls the bitches?'
"Why does everyone have cool shutters in this neighborhood? Is that like a requirement for living here?"
"It's just not very masculine to run around Target shouting about how you can't find the perfect pink tutu."
"Special needs turtles are my favorite turtles."
"Does he shout at the window, 'Release the funds!'"
Person one: You're like Diet Coke.
Person two: Are you insinuating that I'm full of aspartame?
Person one: Among other things.
"So when you have a hundred and three fever, you do really weird things...like dream about snuggling with Katy Perry whilst listening to the Friends theme song..."
"If anyone needs me to B.S. a conversation about Japanese tea ceremonies, just let me know. I'm totally down with that."
"I'm flying my Dork Flag today."
Person one: So, what do you think of gay penguins?
Person two: I LOVE GAY PENGUINS!
"I think I've gone over my daily limit when it comes to the word 'fuck.'"
"So on the one hand, there's you, and you won't sleep with anyone who isn't an animated Disney prince, and then there's him, and he has three basic settings: Walk, Talk, and Screw. And you're telling me you can't see any way that this could end badly?"
Person one: Hmm. Can you get chocolate? Chocolate is good. Especially dark chocolate.
Person two: No. I do not want chocolate. I want sex or vodka. It's that simple.
"CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHY I REMIND EVERYONE I MEET OF A WHINY EFFEMINATE SCOTTISH HOBBIT?"
"Update me on the boyfriend. I want a full personality profile, not just what you said so far. I need to know if he's worthy of your time, let alone your virtue...or what's left of it anyway."
And with that, we say a final adieu to Alien Water Torture.
It's been fun. :)
No comments:
Post a Comment