Last one guys, I swear

I know I'm committing the repeat offense of posting already-written works because I don't have enough to say, but I promise, this is the LAST ONE. There WILL be a proper post, with stolen dialogue and everything, next time. And besides, wouldn't you rather I post short stories and whatnot than not blog at all? ;)

Happy 4th of July, everyone! :)

~4^th of July weekend 2011~

It’s nearly ten o’clock but the sky isn’t quite dark yet,

the sunset obscured by dark-purple clouds

like sinister cotton candy.

I sit on the front porch with my father,

both of us barefoot,

breathing in the humid post-storm air

as we watch the fireworks.

It’s cooled considerably since noon,

when we went into the backyard

and threw ourselves into the pool headfirst,

ignoring the cloudy water and slimy bottom.

“It’s not making chlorine,” my mother warned us.

But she came in too, because it was so

unbearably, ridiculously, incredibly

almost surprisingly hot.

We laid on pool loungers that wouldn’t inflate properly,

sweating through our sunscreen,

until we couldn’t bear it any longer and flipped into the water.

After a dinner of leftovers, my parents went for a walk

while I sat in the kitchen

and watched the sunset

and read books, lots of books,

the smell of my mother’s homemade pound cake filling the house.

Now I sit on the porch with Dad

watching, waiting, but not knowing what I’m waiting for.

“Let’s go for a walk,” I say, and stand up.

He takes my hand and we walk across the wet grass

and into the street.

Fireworks burst all around us,

some of them smaller ones that shoot straight into the sky like comets,

others bigger and more explosive,

bursting on impact and letting loose showers of sparks and stars.

Other than the fireworks, this could be any other night.

But on any other night I would hate my neighborhood,

I would be embarrassed to bring my friends here,

to this deceptively perfect place, this Camazotz of sorts,

this place where we pretend bad things don’t exist.

Tonight I don’t care.

Tonight, I walk through the streets

holding my father’s hand

and wondering if maybe, just maybe,

I should have given this town a chance.

Five things I never thought I'd miss about Interlochen...

...And ten things I knew I would.

THE FIVE:

1. Community Service
Laugh if you want, but it's true. I'm an ex-theatre geek, so it was incredible to go back into the auditorium and work as a stagehand, even if my co-stagehands did think I had more than a few screws loose. And food service was...well, what the heck, you already think I'm nuts...fun. At times, anyway. It was like actually having a real job...only I got paid in good grades. ;)

2. Stone Cafeteria
Yes, the food sucked. Yes, it was noisy. Yes, it was a pain in the butt most days. But I have damn good memories in that cafeteria, and I'm not going to lie, I really miss that place. (However, I do NOT miss the food. I'd just like to make that perfectly clear. Mom, forget coming to Interlochen as a nurse--we need you for HEAD CHEF.)

3. My dorm room
Was it small? Was it crowded? Did my suitemates and I have trouble coexisting at times? Did my hall counselor give me a hard time? Yes, yes, yes, and yes. BUT. It made me feel...go on and roll your eyes...grown-up, like I was at college or something. There's something very freeing about being in a dorm, even if it's at a strict arts boarding school in the middle of freaking nowhere.

In addition to the room itself, there were the noises. What kind of insane person mows the lawn at six A.M.? The caretakers of IAA! What kind of insane person watches a horror movie at one in the morning? The occupants of DeRoy House! What kind of insane person takes a shower at midnight? My suitemates!Yeah! Now, you'd think this would be annoying...and, trust me, it is. But I'll tell you, knowing inside and out every little noise and exactly what's causing it is very helpful if you are like me and can't sleep if you "hear noises."

4. The weather
In the words of my good friend Andrew Way, northern Michigan is uninhabitable during February. Understandable, thanks to the piles of lake snow, the frozen roads which render off-campus trips damn near impossible, and of course walking to class in zero-degree weather. BUT. In December, the snow is actually quite nice. And in fall and spring there IS no snow--just RAIN, which I LOVE. So, I will admit that I said "Thank God!" when snow season was over--but I actually miss the unpredictable Interlochen weather.

5. The dances

There were only three dances at Interlochen that I actually enjoyed: The Halloween dance, the Hipster dance, and of course MORP. The rest of the time, I felt out-of-place and completely awkward. And don't get me started on the epic DJ fail--when I tried to DJ the GSA dance and ended up surrendering my position to the usual IAA DJ and running out of the building in tears. That's one experience I hope to never repeat. But you know what? The few times I had a good time at an IAA dance, I had a BLAST. And I plan to do it again next year...and hopefully, someone will let me DJ again so I can prove that I DO know how to DJ as long as I'm well-prepared.


So there we go. That's five things I didn't think I'd miss about Interlochen. And now...

THE TEN...THINGS I KNEW I'D MISS ABOUT INTERLOCHEN

1. My friends
This one should be self-explanatory. I never shut up about my friends, as anyone who reads this blog or, heck, anyone who has ever spent five minutes with me, will know by now. I love my friends and I miss them. End of story.

2. The concerts/plays/musicals/screenings
It was a WYSO concert at the summer camp that convinced me to go to IAA. This past year, few concerts took place that I did not at least attempt to see. Between the performances of the theatre department and the IAA orchestra, it's a wonder I ever got any homework done.

3. The incredibly strange Saturday Night activities
Here's a few things you will never, ever see normal high schoolers do on Saturday night:
--Make up a new dance to "Thriller" out of sheer boredom
--Run around singing and screaming in an outdoor concert hall (and get in trouble for that)
--Create a mountain-like dessert out of things bought in the local grocery store...and then feed it to the boys downstairs because it's ickily sweet
--Make props for a film using things found in your garbage can and bottom desk drawer
--Analyze the hell out of Jim Henson's Labyrinth, for no reason other than "because we feel like it"
--Sneak into each other's rooms to critique thesis scripts
--Translate UnderOath songs into Spanish
--Go to talent shows WITHOUT being forced to do so by your parents
--Perform in a talent show, but NOT because it'll look good on your college application if you win something
--Willingly go and see a Shakespeare play...without being assigned to do so by a teacher
--Do homework--and enjoy it
...Yes, these are all things that I have actually done.

4. The Coffeehouses
All three times that I sucked up the guts to perform in a Coffeehouse, I made a total fool of myself. The first time, I impulsively decided to read a poem I'd written for the boy I liked, and ended up embarrassing myself so bad that--you guessed it--I started crying the minute I got outside. Then there was the Christmas poem incident, when everyone mistakenly thought I was addressing a lesbian lover (long story, but they were wrong). And finally, the end-of-year Senior Coffeehouse, where everything that could go wrong did. First I missed my rehearsal with my accompanist. Then, the very first act to go on performed the song I was hoping to play. And then because we had to choose a new song, we were totally out of synch and I didn't even finish before getting the HELL out of there.

So why do I miss the Coffeehouses, if I screwed up so much? Easy: Coffeehouse is fun to watch, and it's got this incredible stripped-down vibe that you can't even get in the Agora Ballroom. I heard Jesse McCartney's "Beautiful Soul" performed in a way that made it sound like a good song. I heard a song that a senior actress wrote about pornography...and believe it or not, it was actually quite tasteful. I saw cross-dressing, stripping, and sexy-dancing that was too funny to actually be sensual. Improv jam sessions. Acoustic covers. Singer-songwriters. Original skits. It's something that no Interlochen student wants to miss (literally...Fine Arts is PACKED on most Coffeehouse nights).

5. Motion Picture Arts
It's the reason I'm there. 'Nuff said.

6. Blaming any and all eccentricities on the fact that I'm an art student/filmmaker
You really do have to be an Interlochen alum to get this one. But trust me--we use this excuse a LOT. Why do I stay up til four A.M. on weekends? Because I'm an art student. Why do I draw on my Converse and on my white tank tops? Because I'm an art student. Why do I have a picture of the Joker taped up beside my bed? Because I'm an art student.

There are the major-specific ones, too. Why do I carry a film journal with me everywhere? Because I'm an MPA. Why do I wear that Stingray Sam t-shirt? Because I'm an MPA. Why do I find the concept of loading heavy equipment into a massive truck named after an animal exciting? Because I'm an MPA.

And there's one more...the one that I'm sure we've all said to our parents or our friends at home: "You wouldn't understand...you don't go to Interlochen." Wow. How stuck-up are we about our school to say THAT? I can't even rant against this one--I've used it.

7. Lisa Melnyk's THIS WEEKEND!
This is one of those things I took for granted...until I realized that, what do you know, at home there IS no "This weekend!" because, uh, there's nothing to DO on the weekends. Oxford is Boringtown, USA--yet another reason why I NEED to go back to Interlochen NOW.

8. The Writing House
The Writing Hosue is pretty much my second-favorite place at Interlochen, my #1 favorite being the waterfront (which we'll cover later). In winter, there is nothing like going to the Writing House with a few friends and just chilling out in the huuuge Great Room, which is not only the size of a cathedral but contains a huge fireplace AND a piano--what else do you need? It's cozy and it's PERFECT for hanging out with your friends on a freezing-cold night. ALSO. The Writing House just happens to be where GSA meetings take place...and that just so happens to be where I met The Seal. (See my FaceBook page for more information. (;)

9. The Waterfront
This is more of a spring/summer type thing, the Waterfront. Literally. Because in winter, you can't GET to the Waterfront, thanks to this little thing called SNOW. But when it's semi-warm outside, you can wak to the waterfront and if you're lucky it'll RAIN. And rain is GOOD, especially when you can watch it hitting the lake and...okay, I can tell I'm getting a lot of "are-you-insane" looks. Moving on.

10. The senior MPAs
I will be honest here: The senior/returning MPAs intimidated the hell out of me. At the beginning of the year, my thoughts were along the lines of either "Oh my God, I'm not good enough to be here, how can I possibly EVER measure up to THEM?" or "Thank God for next year when I'LL be a senior returner and won't have to worry about impressing these guys."

Well, guess what? Somewhere in the year it went from "They're better than me" to just plain "They're good, but if I work hard I can be that good too...can you teach me to do that?" I won't pretend that I became best friends with the seniors/returners. But I like to think that I did make friends with some of them, and I am VERY glad to know that there will be a couple of postgrads next year. At the very least, I learned a lot from the seniors in my major. I am proud to have gone to school with such talented people, and I am grateful for the time I spent with them.

...And now I'm getting ridiculously sappy so it's really time to move on.


STOLEN DIALOGUE

"So basically, we can either hang out with the bible-thumpers in Cincinnati, or we can go to Muskegon and hang out with the bible-thumpers there. So I think the general theme here is, if we go to see the Almost, we will have to contend with bible-thumpers."

"I have nothing against the Jonas Brothers...except for the fact that they're idiots."

"He thinks people are after him on the road because he's driving a Toyota. I think that it's just that people don't know how to drive."

Person one [American]: You'd better not mess with me, my daddy teaches at this school.
Person two [International student]: Who's your daddy? (surprised when person one starts laughing) What? What'd I say?
Person one: In America, that phrase has three different meanings, two of which I'm absolutely certain you didn't mean.

"I find it more than a little strange that the only page in the "interests" section of my mom's FaceBook is the page for my musically inclined ex-boyfriend."

"In the words of Dave Barry, Dad, you needed to promptly and professionally get the hell out of there."

"Everybody in this gas station is probably wondering, 'What the hell is she doing?'"

Person one: Right now, I’m going to act weird, so just go along with it.
Person two: Will it kill me?
Person one: I hope not.

Person one: You're crazy.
Person two: That's code for, "You're right, but I really don't want to believe you."

My Summer To-Do List

First off, a MILLION apologies to Jeff--if I'd had my way this would've been up the second I got up this morning. Thanks to a combination of technical difficulties, household chore interference, and simple bad luck, that didn't happen. But the post is here now so we can all be friends again...right?

So it's summer vacation! HELLZ YEAH! *fakes enthusiasm* Okay. Now, please everyone, promise not to call for the men in white coats, but...I'm actually not too psyched about summer break. Why not, you may ask? Well, three reasons: 1) I'm bored as hell; there is literally nothing to do here during the day except write, IM, and unpack (yes, STILL). And the nightlife is practically nonexistent--that just consists of walking around town, seeing crap movies at the local theater, or a library lock-in. 2) All of my friends are Interlochenites or have moved out-of-state, so I am stuck--really, truly stuck--in the company of adults 24/7. 3) I'm so psyched for senior year! C'mon--no math, chilling all year with Mr. Nadji (yes, I AM planning to take Physics and I feel a lot more comfortable knowing ahead of time that I'll have a good teacher), SENIOR THESIS, being on the Welcome Wagon--who WOULDN'T be excited?

So, keeping all that in mind, I have compiled a summer to-do list so that I won't go batshit insane and actually NEED those men in white coats by July.


1. Get those two treatments done
All MPAs should know this one. You know how Michael assigned us two full treatments by the time we're back from break? Well, I want mine solid before we go back. No more yearlong battles with teachers and thesis advisors for me! In fact, because I don't actually have that much else to do (shocking, right?), I might actually start the scripts, too...

2. Get a summer job!
Don't laugh--I actually WANT a summer job. At Hot Topic. Yes, I am just that weird. But legit, nobody except retail or restaurants will hire anyone under the age of eighteen. So, I figure, if I have to have a job, why not at least have fun with it? Besides, where else can I work that will allow me to wear my dad's old band t-shirts? ;)

3. See as many indie films as possible
Seriously, indie film is officially my life. From my old fave, Elephant, to the latest gem that my parents presented to me via Netflix, Killer Diller, a lot of the best films I've ever seen were independent. Now, for those of you who are not film geeks like me, I just want to set one thing straight: INDIE and MUMBLECORE are two different things, okay? Do not mistake "Indie" for "no music, no plot, just dialogue and totally unknown actors and bad sound/film equipment." That is MUMBLECORE, folks. And I should know, I just studied it in class (and nearly died of boredom in the process).

4. See other, non-Indie films
...Like Toy Story 3, The Last Airbender, and Eclipse. Yes, I am going to see the third Twilight film, and no, it is NOT because I have a crush on Robert Pattinson, because I DON'T. Nor do I have a crush on Kristen Stewart (although I do think she is a fairly good actress). REREAD THAT FIVE TIMES, DAN. The reason I am seeing Eclipse is because 1) I think the casting is genius, and 2) I think that deep down I AM a Twilighter, I just refuse to admit it because it isn't "cool." But then again, neither is listening to Michael Jackson, wearing my dad's band tees, or shopping at Land's End. So...screw it, I like Twilight.

5. Dance like crazy!
Okay, this is another geeky one. But I love, love, LOVE dancing, and this is why: When I was little my dad used to put on his oldies albums and dance with me (I mean, like, REALLY freakin' little, like one or two years old), and that just became our thing over the years. So, I am going back to basics. No more grinding with my buddies in Fine Arts, listening to whatever tacky (and I mean that in the best possible way!) Girl Talk remix that the Interlochen DJ throws out for that night. No flashing lights, pretty outfits, hours styling my hair or doing my makeup. Just me and my dad (and the Who or Bruce Springsteen or Meat Loaf) in the living room, in our pajamas, at one A.M..

6. Drive EVERYWHERE
The plan: Get my license the SECOND I turn eighteen. The strategy: Practice every day this summer, study for the driving tests, and get the license on the first day of thanksgiving break, a.k.a. right after my eighteenth birthday. The obstacle: I am one of the most awkward drivers in the history of teenage driving. I am the opposite of my father; instead of speeding, I fight to get up to the speed limit. I am so afraid of breaking driving laws that I inadvertently break them in my attempt to NOT break them. So hopefully I'll get over that this summer.

7. READ!!!!!!!!
I plan to go banananuts with the books this summer. I didn't have nearly enough time to read in the school year. At the top of my must-read list:
--The Novel - I never finished this book, but I want to. It's GOOD. No joke.
--The 1-800-WHERE-R-U series by Meg Cabot, one of my favorite writers.
--Anything by Gail Carson Levine.
--Hamlet--not the watered-down, Shakespeare-for-Idiots version, but the REAL THING.
And that's just the beginning...

8. Relearn piano
I love music and I miss playing piano. 'Nuff said.


So that is my anti-boredom plan. Maybe not the most interesting, worldly plan on earth, but if nothing else it should be fun to watch. (Sorry, another inside joke with my dad...)


STOLEN DIALOGUE - CAR EDITION
(This stolen dialogue all takes place within the confines of a motor vehicle. The only question is, how have none of the drivers who took place in this dialogue gotten into a wreck from laughing so hard they can't see the road?)

Person one (joking): Just run this guy over.
Person two: No! He has a family!
Person one: No, he has that hat. If he had a family, they wouldn't buy him that hat or allow him to wear it.

Person one: Whenever she gets behind the wheel, she has this evil scientist laugh.
Person two (imitating the person whom person one is referring two): "Hee hee, I'm going to kill both of these hopeless bastards!"

(after getting distracted by a deer and nearly running off the road; Person two is driving and Person three is sitting on the passenger side--the side that came closest to hitting the mailbox)
Person one: You should've seen those deers--they were so cute, eating that landscape, they were just chowing down!
Person two: Oh, believe me, you don't have to tell me about the deer! I'm well aware of it! I saw it! And as a result I almost hit some poor asshole's mailbox!
Person three: Oh, believve me, you don't have to tell me that you almost hit the mailbox! I'm well aware of it!

Person one: I swear on all things good and holy, if you don't shut up I'll--
Person two: "Good and holy?" Honey, there is nothing good OR holy inside this car.

(While taking the long way home)
Person one: Why the hell are we on this road?
Person two: Hey, you're the one who said you'd like for her to have new driving experiences.
Person two: I'd like to get home!
Person one: Well, it's better out here! There's less stuff for her to hit!

(Person one just accidentally leaned on the horn while getting out of the car)
Person one: I have no comment.
Person two: Thank God somebody doesn't.

"My hair has more cowlicks than a dude ranch!"

(While sitting behind a bus, during a traffic jam)
"Why the hell are we parked behind this bus? Parking behind a bus isn't really my idea of a pleasant experience."

Person one: So she kept playing that damn Gavin DeGraw CD over and over! I swear, this guy - Gavin DeGraw - is one of the whinest - worse than the guy from 3 Doors Down -
Person two: Brad Arnold? Oh yeah, he IS the whiniest singer ever.
Person one: Oh, you haven't - no, seriously, I ahve to play you Gavin DeGraw, you think Brad Arnold whines, you haven't heard Gavin DeGraw.
Person two: If my name was 'Gavin DeGraw,' I'd whine too.

(looking at an advertisement for a haunted house, featuring a skeleton)
"$5 off? $5 off what, the skeleton? No, I think I'll leave the skeleton alone, thanks."